Week 35...I could eat a horse!

My wrinkled (from washing dishes) fingers find themselves blogging at almost 3:00 a.m. tonight as an attempt to fill some of the time I have until Bliss and my body are ready to go to sleep. If you’re someone I talk to regularly, you’re well aware that sleep has become a long lost art to this 35-week-pregnant soul. I lost the art about 3 weeks ago and have a feeling it may be a while before it is found again. Our Bliss has outgrown her small compartment in this 5’2” body of mine and is making it much known. I’ve become well acquainted with her sweet little feet, and if we could see me from the inside out I believe my ribs (and entire right side) would resemble something of this color:

An old photo from a project at school in color class. My promise ring from
Eric that he gave me over 6 years ago...on our 2 year anniversary. 

Although it’s not so fun being kicked and poked all day and night, I am ever so thankful and would endure it until the end of time to know that our baby is healthy and active. I’ve come to the conclusion that she’s probably stuck in this position from here on out, with her head down and her feet and legs buried into my right side (sometimes they kind of float to the middle, but always return back to the ribs). This is exciting because she is now the length that she will be when she’s born, spanning somewhere around the 20 inch mark. In the next few weeks she will be gaining her last bit of baby weight and preparing to enter our world. I’m prayerful that she gains to a healthy weight, but is still a smaller baby as to allow for a ‘less painful’ (if that’s possible!?) birth. As many have asked and responded in astonishment, yes…I am going to try to have a natural birth with the absence of epidural. Go ahead, I know you’re rolling your eyes or shaking your head, haha. Everyone else has, you mind as well too! I give a disclaimer when I tell people this, which is… “I’ve never had a child before, so I’m not saying I know what it’s going to be like or how it’s going to feel. I don’t know how I’m going to react to the pain or how I will handle it. But I’m simply going in with a positive attitude and a prayerful heart that I can endure the process as holistically as possible and have a natural birth.” And that’s all. With the help of my Father God I believe I can do it. It will be a time of faith and a time of extreme commitment, and a challenge that I’m looking forward to conquering (Prayers are always welcome regarding this matter!).

In other news, I think it’s absurd (however, not surprising) how the American people reacted to Osama bin Laden’s death. Can we not take a step back first and look at how we are acting before 3,000 people gather in celebration in the middle of the night in front of the white house as the news was just broadcasted? Is this scene not the spitting image of those who were on the streets in their country celebrating the fall of the twin towers and the death of Americans? We think it’s ghastly to celebrate the death or destruction of the foreign, yet we do the same. Yes, he led the mission to kill hundreds of innocent people and should rightly be punished for it. And Yes, I say God bless our troops, just like every other American soul does. But to act in such a way of celebration and elation at the death of a lost soul is appalling to me. We teach our children that killing is wrong by killing them before they kill us? It’s like teaching small children about hitting. “You hit your sister, so I’m going to hit you to teach you that hitting is wrong and you shouldn’t hit anyone else.” Does 2+2=5? This doesn’t make sense and seems very elementary to me. Everyone has their opinions and I respect them all, and this is simply mine. I think our nation’s reaction was very hypocritical to what we ‘preach’ to the other nations of the world, and I think it was uneducated and somewhat embarrassing.

“I take no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but rather that the wicked turn from his way and live.”
-Ezekiel 33:11

I’m not.. and never have been.. and never will be.. one to be involved or even interested in politics or national affairs. I hated Political Science and passed the course only because I crammed before the tests. However, things of this nature make me raise an eyebrow now that I’m going to have a little one in the world. There will come a day when she is here and we are not, and the world that is being built now is the one she’ll be living in then. I fear for the worse and hope for the best.

On another note, Eric fell asleep on my belly earlier this evening and it was the sweetest thing. (I’m having to pause for a deep breath. Bliss has both feet shoved as high into my ribs as they will go and she’s not budging! Ouch!) We were watching a baseball game and as his eyes got droopy he ended up sliding over and crashing for a nap next to Bliss. He eventually started snoring and woke himself up, but for a good little while I had the two most important things to me in the world right in my arms. She was kicking and moving around the whole time under his head, but he was asleep and couldn’t feel it apparently. (I think she was telling him he was in her space! Haha). I simply cannot wait for the little lovebug to be here so we can hug and kiss her and hold her all day (and night, I’m sure).

Something I wasn't really prepared for or expecting was being so hungry. About 5 times a day now I feel like I'm literally starving to death! haha. I've done well with my weight all through the pregnancy, and I haven't had any crazy cravings or eating sprees....and I guess it's all catching up to me now. The fact that I have a 6 lb human inside of me eating all my food comforts my decision to eat a big bowl of Blue Bell ice cream in the middle of the night :). And follow it with an orange and a glass of Braum's chocolate milk. And possibly a banana! I'm trying to make smart, healthy food choices, but I'm not kidding...I think I could eat a horse sometimes I'm so hungry! Speaking of which... I think I might have a little snack now, haha. Turkey sandwich, anyone?

It’s nearing 4:00 a.m. now, and I sure do miss sleeping at night. I just can’t sleep (which is common near the end of pregnancy). But as several people have assured me, this is just God’s little way of preparing me for when the baby comes. I can now endure the crazy up-and-down nights and days, and function on just a few hours of sleep. I sleep when Bliss sleeps, and her schedule is backwards right now. She’s up moving around, getting the hiccups, and being active all night long. However, usually around 9:00 a.m. she quiets down and becomes still and that’s when we sleep! I usually wake for Eric’s lunch break and then return to bed for a couple of hours for an afternoon nap. She’s awake all night and sleeps all day….already! Go figure.

I think I’ll wash a few more dishes and put up some laundry, and then try to lie down for an hour or two before Eric rises at 6:00 a.m. We have breakfast together most every morning before he goes to work, and then I proceed to try to get some actual sleep after he leaves. Hopefully little miss wiggle worm feels like sleeping soon!

"The best way to predict your future is to create it."
-Peter Drucker
 
All Our Love,
JenEric